15 Life Lessons for When You Turn 33

Advice from my mentors on my birthday

“A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.” - James Keller

I strongly believe in the quote above and it’s something that I’ve lived by in both my personal and professional life. Nothing has helped me understand the opportunities at every crossroad like the help of mentors who have been there before. You can learn something from everyone around you, whether it’s your parents, friends, uncles, aunts, or your colleagues. Relationships are really what grounds us and helps us build the community that ultimately defines our values and helps us grow. Since today is my 33rd birthday, I decided to reach out to my own community to ask what they would tell their 33 year-old selves. There’s plenty of advice out there for almost every year of your life before 30, as far as I can tell, but not a whole lot once you leave your early thirties. So this was an interesting exercise in figuring out how different people look back on their life at 33, whether they’re still in their thirties or thinking back a few decades in the past. Here are the 15 life lessons from my mentors that I think we can all learn from.

1. Practice acceptance, not anxiety.

Anxiety doesn’t change the outcome of anything and by accepting what is making you anxious, you can often put things in better perspective.

2. It’s okay to admit you made a big mistake, no matter how big.

This one is not always easy, but it’s better to admit mistakes because even if it was a mistake, you are still learning from it and being uncomfortable is usually a sign of growth.

3. Acquire Bitcoin and sell in 2021.

Me too, Brian. Me too.  

4. Have balance in all things, but put your health first.

I think balance and equilibrium in life is something that we all aspire to have but when you put your health first, the rest will follow.

5. Making mistakes is a critical ingredient to growth and success.

Mistakes were a common theme for a lot of these lessons. I don’t think we can really reach our full potential without being able to make mistakes, learn from them, and apply them to our future.

6. Take joy in helping others, but let others help you, too.

Sometimes, we’re often so focused on helping other people that we lose sight of ourselves and risk refusing help when we most need it, especially when life gets so busy.

7. Keep finding circles of quiet in the natural world, because there is no better way to ground yourself. 

Whether life is mostly based on electronics, the indoors, or a busy workplace or city, it’s important to find your center within the noise. Natural environments can help us regain focus and catch our breath, while becoming new sources of inspiration. 

8. Be mindful of your reactions.

In a lot of situations, the only thing you can really control is how you react. By practicing healthy responses to different circumstances and relationships, we gain a better understanding of life and our role within different relationships, including our relationship with ourselves.

9. Calm down and take a breath - nothing is fast or easy.

In our thirties, we may expect to have made all the answers already. The truth is that, if we’re very lucky, we may have found a road that we want to travel but our journey has really just started. By being patient with the process, we can appreciate the moments on that journey.

10. Surround yourself with people who bring out the best in you.

Relationships come and go throughout life. As we grow, it’s most important to understand how different relationships bring out different sides of ourselves, making sure we keep the people who bring out the best in us close.

11. Be forgiving, because we are all muddling along.

It’s easy to judge or criticize people for doing something that we ourselves might never imagine doing or leading a life that we don’t understand. By simply being more understanding, we can become more forgiving and more peaceful.

12. Pay more attention to your relationships.

As we age, we sometimes lose sight of the most important relationships in our life. People spread out and priorities change among friends and family, but relationships are the most important thing in our lives and we should always stay focused on the people that matter.

13. Live life the way you want.

Sometimes, it can feel like there’s a specific way that life should be lived and if you aren’t achieving something at the right time or you haven’t reached a certain milestone, you’re falling behind. Everyone is following a different path. By embracing the life we want to live, we can also embrace who we are and the life that fulfills us the most.

14. Put yourself first.

You are your number one advocate and by making sure that we are always conscious of what we really want and staying mentally and physically healthy along the way, we can become the best version of ourselves. Like they say on airplanes, you have to put your oxygen mask on first before helping others.

15. Be confident and speak your mind.

There’s something to be said for being humble, but that doesn’t mean falling into the background. A healthy ego is just as important to our self-worth as our relationships, because that’s how we fit within our community - especially when we’re confident and speak the truth as we see it. 

I would like to say THANK YOU to all my mentors, colleagues, and friends who shared their wisdom for this blog post. You inspire me every single day and I would not be the person I am today without you.

Keep Smiling,

Dhoreena Ventura